Club Jay

August 6th, 2022 by Patrick Starks

The streets were filled with nothing but bright lights and drunken fools that danced in the rain. While all the girls got in for free, all the guys had fought with the bouncers embarrassingly to get in just the same. I don’t think I need to explain how well that went down, but let’s just say it always ended with someone on their butt, although it wasn’t going to be one of those nights for me and the boys. That night was to be one story I would tell until the day I die.

Thanks to our good friend Jason we would be getting into one of the biggest clubs in the city, Club Jay, and with no struggle at all. Apparently Jason and the club owner Jay went back as far as the hairline of the guy in front of me. Jason never really said anything about it until now, but that was Jason as he was always known to be the most mysterious one out of the bunch. It sometimes baffled me how he was even a friend of mine. I can’t say that I know where the guy even works if he has siblings, or which one of us out of my friends met him first. It was just one day he was there.

After about half an hour of standing out in the cold, we would finally reach the bouncer. He was monstrously tall, and that’s coming a lot from a guy myself who is six foot four. This guy had to be at least a seven-footer and with muscle all over; a modern-day Goliath.
Jason then pulled out a small card from his wallet, which was solid red but strangely with nothing written on it. Jason was barely holding on to it with his shaking hands, for although he was invited, he was just as nervous as the rest of us. The bouncer smiled cynically to the fear we had shown. His teeth would be jagged and looked to be stained with daily doses of drip coffee. Then again, maybe it was something else because I drink coffee everyday and am not even close to what the bouncer was revealing.
The bouncer then leaned forward said:
“So Jay gave you one of these huh?” He asked in humorous way.
Jason nodded.
The bouncer would then walk over to consult the other who was just as big as he was. They both chuckled as their backs were turned to us like two silver back gorillas.
“Alright then gentlemen, come on in and have the time of your lives,” said the bouncer.
“Yeah, and don’t be too shy around the ladies either. They don’t bite, much,”joked the other bouncer, which I felt a little wasn’t a joke at all, but having fun was the only thing on my mind. After my big break up with my girlfriend, well, ex-grilfriend Jasmine of three years, I needed a drink; something strong, something… Beautiful.

Nevertheless, the bouncers stepped aside and before we knew it we were looking at an enormous floor of people getting their groove on. Some had on red and some didn’t. I guess not everyone got the memo which was easy to say seeing how I was wearing a black V-neck shirt myself, but that was besides the point.

Of course, I had been to many clubs, but never had I seen one at such a high frequency. Something about the energy it held was far greater than electric. It was something from a different world, something indescribable.

“Alright boys group huddle,” said Mike.
We all then huddled like a football team getting ready to do their last play of the game. The only question was would it be the winning play or the losing?
“Alright boys you know the drill, hands out,” said Mike.
We all sighed.
“Ugh come on man not this again,” said Bryson.
“Well do you want to talk to one of these beautiful ladies with bouncer breath or do you want to have breath so sweet one of them will be begging for a kiss, just begging for a taste. You know girls love their sweets. So, why not test like one am I right?” said Mike, excitingly.
“Jesus Mike, you and those damn Mike an d Ikes. Why can’t you ever just bring mints or Orbit gum like a normal human being?” asked Jason.
“Because like I said man, women like fruity stuff, stuff thats sweet. I’ve done my research, I know. For a fact that mints or even orbit gum aren’t nearly as sweet as the Mike and Ikes. So, it’s either you all hold our your hands or be prepared to be rejected by every girl for the entire night.

We had all shook our heads, but we knew Mike was right. No woman wanted to talk to guy that had smelly breath or who smelt bad in general.
After we had all taken a few Mike and Ikes, we all then spread out like a pack of hungry wolves.

I like I mentioned before needed a drink due to certain circumstances. So, I had made the obvious route towards the bar.
It was as jam packed as a football stadium, but with a little patience and faith I would finally reach the bartender. She was completely in a rut, losing where she began or even where she was ending. I felt sorry for her. I was a barista for a few years which I know isn’t quite the same as being a bartender, but still, I understood the pressure she was feeling, for it felt like I was always swarmed by self instilled, impatient, demanding narcissus… Need I say more? Nah, that’s enough said.
I then leaned forward over the counter top.
“Do you want me to tag you out?” I asked.
The bartender looked at me as if I was crazy. I’m sure it wasn’t the most random thing a guy had ever asked her, but I’d argue to say that it was probably the most creative.
“Hey we’ve been waiting fifteen whole minutes! Where is our drinks!” Shouted a group of girls.
They all looked like they had had enough drinks for one night, but I wasn’t going to be the guy to and tell them that. Let’s just say a wolf knew better to step into a lions den. Let alone, a den full of Lionesses.
There was something oddly strange about them. Neither of them looked like they were from the city. In fact, they all looked like they were from a different time and place. They all wore corset’s and had dark hair that would have went past their waist side had they not had them in buns and pigtail’s.
“Hey so you gonna gawk at the she devils over there for the rest of the night or do you want to help me get them out of my hair?” asked the bartender annoyed.

Without any hesitation, I jumped over the counter top. It was just me and the bartender now, surrounded by the hundreds. I thought to myself if it were a zombie apocalypse this would be the typical scene for two people to get trapped behind a bar having to defend themselves with nothing but the empty bottles of alcohol from all the sorrows
They originally tried to drink away.
“What do they want?” I asked.
The bartender shook her head confused for she could not comprehend what was going on that night.
“I honestly don’t know what the hell is going on anymore. This is my first night working here and all anyone has asked me for is bloody marry, and that’s exactly what the she devils over there are asking for.”

After what the bartender had said I looked around the club once more. I didn’t notice it until then, but it wasn’t only that people were wearing red, it was that the entire club was painted red; red lights, red balloons, red stage, and of course, the red drinks. And to add to all of that, the card that Jason showed to the bouncer was red as well.

It was in that moment I was beginning to feel like something bad was about to happen. I just hoped it wasn’t one of those sick freakish orgies you know… knowing Mike he would have been completely up for it, which sometimes made me doubt if he was the best person for me to keep around as a friend, but I wouldn’t have been the only one in the world that had a friend like that. You should probably let them go, yet they make your life a lot less boring than what it could be.

Being haste for time, I got started on the bloody marry’s. It was so hot in the club that sweat was already begging to drip down my face after serving the first five drinks. Part of me regretted a little signing up for help. After all, I was there to have a good time, not to work for free, but it was what it was I guess, then again with me being there I could tell that the bartender was at least beginning to relax a little more.
Her smile was now contagious, that of which made me smile harder than I had ever since the break uo with Jasmine.
It was a lot of work bringing down the crowd but something about me and the bartender felt right. We made a great team. Possibly we could be even more, but wonder how much of that is true or just my sad and lonely desperation talking.

Out of nowhere, the lights had gone out as I was making my fortieth bloody marry. Immediately a spotlight would hit the stage of the club, and n the middle of it would be a man that looked as if he had created with a paintbrush All the girls screamed Jay, while all the guys quietly envied his greatness, but Jay wouldn’t be alone as Jason was standing right next to him smiling as he had always done. Jay then spoke.
“Today is a special night as you all might know. Today is this club’s thousand year anniversary!” shouted Jay.
Jason looked confused by what jay meant by a thousandth, but still, the crowd chanted Jay’s names.
Jay then mediately raised up both his hands calming everyone in the room, as he still had much more to say.
“Settle down everyone, settle down. The party will continue soon enough, but first I wanted to acknowledge my good friend Jason here and thank him for all that he has done for me and my family, more so, the support he has given me since we were kids. I was so young then, still not knowing what I was, but that was all until my father Jay Larevera Sr passed down the family business to me after his unfortunate… How should I say it heart attack… However, I’m not going to stand here and saddened all of you with the story of how a boy lost his father. No, again, today is a celebration! Our anniversary! And what better than to give my good friend Jason a gift he will hold forever? You have always been like family to me my friend and it’s time that I officially make you one. Bring it in man…”

Jay then opened his arms out ready to embrace Jason with a loving hug, as family. Jason speechlessly came in for Jay really was like a brother to him. Again, he never spoke much about the relationship he and Jay had, however, I could tell that the two had a pretty strong brotherly bond. While the two hugged everyone in the club watched silently. It was strange and awkward all in one. I had never seen such a touching moment go down without one woman saying aww, but none of them did so much as breathe. They were all like mannequins; lifeless and still.
After a few seconds Jason tried to break away, but it appeared that Jay was not ready to let go just yet. Intensity grew within everyone’s eyes as they all silently chanted Jays name.
“Jay… Jay…. Jay…”
“What’s going on Jay? Let go man,” said Jason, struggling to break free.
Jay sighed at the thought of what he was about to do. Jason would of course hate him for it, but in his heart Jay felt that he would learn to understand what had been given to him.
“I’m sorry Jason, I promise it won’t be painful if you relax. It will be over before you know man. Plus when it’s all over you can have any of these ladies you want,” smiled Jay, now bearing canine teeth like a sabertooth.
Jason looked towards the crowd for help, but all of them were just the same; fangs sticking out of their mouths like a snake, with bloodshot red eyes, already feeding on a few victims that did not know what they had stumbled upon either. Jason then looked back at Jay. A tear shed down the side of his face as he silently begged for Jay to stop, but before anything else could be said about it Jay’s mouth would be covered in Jason’s blood.

I panicked. I looked to my right to see if the bartender was okay, but she wasn’t. Not in the slightest. It was like watching a horror movie as five vampires swarmed her like hyenas draining her dry. One on her neck, two on both arms and two on both legs. She deserved so much better than that but there was nothing I could do. She was gone. The only thing that I could do was get the hell out of there , but I was completely cornered. If I didn’t think of something quick I was going to be just like the Bartender.
So, I did the only thing I knew I could do best. I spread alcohol all around me and lit a match, setting the entire on fire. It was crazy, but I told myself if I was going to die I was going out in a blaze not with punctures all over.

As the fire ignited and continued to rise, all the vampires backed away. From above a few Mike and Ikes had fallen to the floor which now I could argue with the bartender if she was still alive that that was probably the most random experience at a bar. I looked up and by my surprise, it would be Mike alive and well.
“Hey! Grab this!” he shouted, throwing down a rope.
I don’t know where the hell he got it from, but I was still thankful that he had it.
I grabbed the rope and began climbing. All the vampires screamed like sirens with the frustration that I was getting away, but as I climbed and looked back Jay would be still standing on the stage as cool as cat knowing that he would get us eventually, but that wasn’t the strangest part to it all; Jason’s body was now gone.
Once I reached the end of the rope Mike pulled me in and we’d both fall to the floor. We both looked like we had seen a ghost, but the good thing was that we weren’t alone anymore. We at least had each other’s back.
“Shit man did you see what that monster did to Jason! What the hell do we do?” Asked Mike, shoving Mike and Ikes in his face like a drug addict.
“I don’t know…. Just calm down, let’s think about all of this.”
“Think? What’s there to think about man? Freaking vampires are after us! I mean they really freaking exist! I don’t want to get bit man, promise me you won’t let me get bit?”

I then rested my hands on Mikes shoulders and then slapped the shit out of him.
“Yeah. Yeah, I see much clearer now. Thanks, man I needed that. Let’s get the hell out of here. I found an exit. It’s right down the hall near the bathrooms but we gotta go back downstairs.”
“What are you talking about man? You just threw me a rope to get away from the lower section and now we have to go back down?”
Mike then popped more Mike and Ikes in his mouth this time not chewing but swallowing them as if they were medicine.
“There’s no other way man. We gotta do it.”
Me and Mike looked back down towards the lower section and by our surprise, everyone was gone. Not a single vampire, neither was there a single drop of blood, but then the faded sounds of sirens would approach the club, and following behind it would eventually be three hard knocks on the club door. Eager as we were to get the hell out, me and Mike rushed down to the lower floor to tell the Police all that was going on but before we had even gotten to the door Jay and his bouncers would be there to greet them.

“Hey there, we got a call about a disturbance. Everything okay in there” asked the sheriff.
Jay smiled, but this time didn’t have the fangs he had originally used to bite a plug-in Jason’s neck.
“I assure you officer that everything is fine here. We actually have been doing a little renovating. That could be the possible reason for the noise complaint, but we will do our best to be careful going forward.”
The Sheriff looked at the bouncer awkwardly. He didn’t like him. Something about him had given him the creeps but he wouldn’t be the first to feel that way.

Eventually the sheriff would go back to his car along with his deputy that couldn’t keep her eyes off of Jay. It was as if she was in a trance. She begged for the Sheriff to stay, but the sheriff had drug her by the arm as if she were his own little girl, throwing her in the car like a rag doll. It was apparent to everyone they had a father-daughter type of relationship.
Once they had vanished in the fog of the city Jay and his bouncer would turn around calling for us to come down.
“Alright boys, come on down. We promise we won’t bite, too hard…”
Again, the bouncers had done their awkward chuckles standing by jay like two gargoyles.
“I got a plan,” said Mike.
“Oh no… What kind of plan? Mike, I hope you do know that this is a life and death situation.”
“I know, I know. Just trust me.”
Mike then went down the steps to greet Jay and his bouncers, holding his hands high up in the air to show that he was surrendering. Jay looked surprise. It was without a doubt probably the boldest move he’d ever seen anyone do, but still, he stood guarded and ready.

“Ah so there you are,” he said.
“Yeah I’m here, just don’t bite me dude. Like I’m serious. I don’t want to be bitten. Here have a Mike and Ike as a peace offering.”
Jay looked at the Mike and Ike’s suspiciously. What exactly was he trying to pull off? Was it all in good faith or was it a trick? But before Jay could even comprehend what Mike was trying to do both the bouncers would take the entire box and shove a few down their mouths.

“What do you think you are doing ghouls!”
“We’re sorry master but we’re so tired of everyone saying that our breath smells. Even the lady vamps think our breath is horrible…”
“Your breath is supposed to be! You are ghouls! You are not to seduce but to terrify… You know what never mind.”
Both bouncers then reached for heir necks. They huffed and puffed, and nearly tore down everything within their vicinity. They coughed up black blood that looked like ink from an octopus all until they’d both fallen to the floor with eyes translucent enough to see what little soul he had behind them.

“What did you do to my ghoul!” Shouted Jay, now bearing the fangs of a lion.
“Garlic asshole!” Said Mike confidently.
“No, that is not it. Ghouls cannot die by garlic as they are not Vampires. Give me the box!”
Mike threw them fearful of what would happen had he not.
Jay stood annoyed reading the box line to line and then he stopped.
“Peanut oil! What kind of candy…. Mike and Ike’s. Since when did they… You know what its fine. I knew what happen one day. It was my fault for creating two brother ghouls who were allergic to peanuts. However, allow me to introduce you to their replacements.

Out from the shows, Jason appeared but he wouldn’t be alone. It had left me and Mike in awe that Jay had somehow gotten Bryson as well. We both stood speechless and a lost sense of hope of what could be done next.
“And I guess while we’re at it, meet my two brides.”
It was then I dropped to the floor. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. It was the bartender and out of all the women in the world my ex-girlfriend Jasmine.

_To be continued_


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